Tag: funny
member name: Jan S.
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March 14, 2008 10:42 PM EDT --
Tony had just finished his training session at the local McDonald's.
So he was a little nervous being behind the register for the first time. His first customer ordered a milkshake.
"Tony," . . .
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March 18, 2008 09:53 PM EDT --
A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When . . .
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March 06, 2008 02:53 AM EST --
In Kingsville, Texas, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.
It is illegal for hens to lay eggs before 8 a.m. and after 4 p.m. in Norfolk, Virginia.
. . .
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March 21, 2008 02:18 PM EDT --
My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his shirt was hanging out.
"I know," he replied. "It's a fad me and some of the guys started." . . .
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March 06, 2008 02:58 AM EST --
A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, 'Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today.' The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her . . .
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December 02, 2009 05:28 AM EST --
Some folks think that I don't live an exciting life. Well, anyone might think that if they do not consider driving without brakes exciting. Speaking from experience, I can testify that . . .
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November 11, 2007 05:00 AM EST --
What's the weirdest job you've ever had? Tell us about the job or a weird, wacky or wild experience you've had on any job.
My weirdest job was one I took out of a desparate . . .
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March 13, 2008 08:52 PM EDT --
During a taxi run, the crew of a U.S. Air flight to Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727.
The irate ground controller (a female) screamed, "U.S. Air 2771, . . .
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March 13, 2008 08:55 PM EDT --
A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the old saying, "You can't take it with you."
After much thought and consideration, . . .
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March 13, 2008 09:11 PM EDT --
LOOKING GOOD
My face in the mirror isn't wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn't dirty. The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.
I think I might never put . . .
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July 11, 2008 12:40 AM EDT --
Convinced the human race is totally wacko? Here are some signs of the times in support of such a view. An example is the hotel-provided shower cap in a box labeled: "Fits one head."
Others . . .
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February 10, 2008 01:47 AM EST --
Tom decided to buy his wife a Valentine gift
"How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk.
She showed him a bottle costing $50.
"That's a bit much," said . . .
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March 12, 2008 07:53 PM EDT --
When you buy anything secondhand, make sure you have everything to make it go.
A small boy was pushing a gasoline-powered lawn mower down the street with a "For Sale" sign on it. As he . . .
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March 13, 2008 08:47 PM EDT --
It was a Ladies Only Night in the All Blonde Bingo Hall. The night had been pretty boring, not one single person had a BINGO all night.
The last game was up for grabs, with a huge bingo prize of . . .
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March 14, 2008 01:58 AM EDT --
An elderly looking gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair well groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel, smelling slightly of a good after shave, presenting a well-looked-after image, . . .
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March 17, 2008 12:15 AM EDT --
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet . . .
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May 07, 2008 02:37 PM EDT --
While walking in the woods, Douglas saw a young fairy who had fallen into the river and bravely dived in to rescue her.
In gratitude, the fairy granted Douglas three wishes. He wished for a huge . . .
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May 08, 2008 03:56 PM EDT --
Romance: The art of slowly and seductively unwrapping your chocolate bar.
Diet: Cutting down from 12 to 11 chocolate gateaux per day.
Recipe: A formula to ensure that chocolate is included . . .
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May 09, 2008 04:56 PM EDT --
This is my third Chocolate-themed submission. You can probably guess my priorities. This is good information for dieters who love chocolate.
I especially like number 7.
. . .
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July 02, 2008 04:22 PM EDT --
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. They loaded up Jack's station wagon and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. They pulled into a nearby . . .
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